Dating taking back an ex boyfriend
Men are attracted to women who have the vibe of being OK (not anxious, worried, hostile, upset, etc.).
Men are attracted to women who have the vibe of being enthusiastic (not insecure, pessimistic, negative, etc.).
What I mean by this is that if you take on a certain perspective, you are guaranteed to act needy.
And if you take on a different perspective, you will never act needy.
In another sense, you already have a relationship with him… So, to answer your questions about what to do and if you can get him back… It is counter-intuitive, but when women fixate on a guy (and worse, a specific outcome with a guy), they are destroying their mood and ability to be attractive.
When you take on the perspective of, “I need this guy to be this specific way with me…
I tried to be there for him but he totally withdrew and would reject my advances and we started fighting a lot because of it.
He told me he loves me, but felt like I was smothering him and he needed to find himself.
He suggested we stay friends but I told him that would be too hard on me and he said I can contact him anytime. Men want to mentally work out whatever is bothering them, solve it, and then they’ll re-emerge, ready to conquer the world.
All I want is to quietly solve the problem by myself. So with all that in mind, you could sum it up by saying: I want her to give me space and I want her to be OK while she’s giving me space.
All relationships are going to require moments where you give the guy space.
Moreover, it’s in your best interest to live your life in a way that brings you happiness in your moment-to-moment existence without effort…
and abandon any perspective or pursuit that has you feeling crappy in your moment-to-moment experience in service of some imagined better future.